It really is. Being a stay-at-home mom has so many perks.
- You don’t have the pressures of pleasing an employer, just try to keep your kiddos happy. That’s easy, right?
- You get to nap when the kids are napping. What job allows that? But don’t forget that when the kids were babies, you had to get up many times during the night for feeding and soothing and diaper changing. Also, if you have more than one kid, good luck getting them to nap at the same time. If you only have one kid, it’s probably better to get stuff done around the house instead of napping, right?
- You generally don’t have to lift more than 50 pounds at a time. You’d be surprised at how many job descriptions say that an employee needs to be able to lift up to 50 pounds. Generally, kids are under 50 pounds until they don’t need to be picked up anymore, but you can expect to be picking up a 10 to 40-pound child 10-100 times a day.
- You don’t have to make food that is cooked to perfection or provide impeccable service like chefs and waitresses at restaurants. You just need to make sure your kids have four or more balanced meals per day. They need to have lots of protein, healthy fats, carbs, fruits and veggies and actually think it’s yummy. You need to make sure they have lots of variety in their food so that as they grow they have a palate that actually enjoys healthy food.
- You don’t have to go to medical school or dental school to become a mom. You are just expected to know when they need to go to the emergency room and when they can just wait out a sickness at home. If you are wrong about them not needing to go to the ER or to the doctor then you have to deal with the consequences and the guilt afterwards. You have to know when they are teething and how to deal with it, how to extract teeth and how to pin down a screaming child who hates getting their teeth brushed so that their teeth don’t rot out of their mouths and the dentist doesn’t judge you.
- Since you are home all day, you can sit whenever you want, wherever you want. Of course, if your kids catch you sitting and doing nothing, they will be quick to give you something to do. They want you to crawl around on the floor chasing them and roaring like you’re a crazy monster or lion, or they want you to sit in the uncomfortable kid chairs so they can “feed” you their amazing food they concocted in their play kitchen. Or, they want you to push them around in their toycar or take them to the park. Or they will come saying urgently, “Pee pee! I have to go pee pee!” at which point you have to jump off your lazy butt to get them to the toilet in time.
- You don’t have to scrub toilets all day like janitors and housekeepers. But you do have to wipe butts…it feels like all day. Especially if you have a kid who just got potty-trained and a baby still in diapers. On top of that, if you want your house to look halfway decent when the spouse comes home, well, you have to keep up with the myriad of dishes that keep piling up and the toys that keep getting out of the toybox and the books that keep falling to the floor of their own volition. You have to wipe up the spilled milk and food off the floor and the drool that keeps coming out of the baby’s mouth like it’s a drippy faucet.
Well, since I became a stay-at-home mom, life has been pretty easy. There’s no timecard to fill out or pressure to be on time except when someone has to go potty. I get to sleep in, when the baby sleeps in. I don’t have to worry about my appearance which is probably why I exude the fact that I am a SAHM.
The only hard thing about being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) is that everyday is a marathon. Actually, running a marathon is SOOOO much easier than being a SAHM. You have to pace yourself all day, everyday for your kids. You don’t get any financial compensation. You are on call 24/7 with barely any breaks EVER. Your relationship with your spouse is easily put aside (which it NEVER should be). Everyone depends on you to set the mood for the house EVERY FREAKIN’ DAY. It’s so hard to see the end. You do the SAME darn thing every single day for over 18 years. At the end of 18 years you look and see if you did a good job or not. That’s the only hard part about being a SAHM.
The thing is, it’s not just hard for SAHMs. I think it’s hard for moms everywhere. I know some moms who went to medical school, but chose not to work when they became mothers. I know some moms who definitely don’t need to work- at least, financially- but choose to work to keep their own sanity and identity. Being a SAHM isn’t the easiest thing, but it isn’t the hardest thing either. Being a mom is the hardest thing, whether or not you work or stay home all day everyday. My two sisters who are the breadwinners in their homes probably wish they didn’t have to work everyday, but probably wouldn’t want to stay home everyday either. For them, they have to juggle work life and the home life. That is HARD in its own category.
To all moms out there, always remember that we have the hardest job in the world- preparing our children to be part of this world as adults and preparing them to change the world with their lives. No matter what we choose to do – stay at home or go to work- we could all use more support (and not just in our bras) and less judgment.