Wherever there are girls involved, there are huge possibilities of drama. Luckily for me there were only two instances when a girl was seriously inappropriate with my man. Here is a recounting of these humorous events.
When I was in college, I finally got my first (and only) boyfriend. I brought him home one Christmas break. One of my sisters was blatantly all over him. I got super annoyed. Of all people, my sister. Seriously? Have you no shame? Sometimes, she was literally sitting on his lap. Once, we were at Universal Studios, I was holding his hand and this sister literally came and moved my hand out of his and held his hand. I could not believe it. That was it. I knocked out her two front teeth. Here’s a picture for proof.
Actually, she was my younger sister and only 6 years old. Of course, I didn’t knock out her teeth. We just laughed a lot that Christmas and maybe it was confirmed that my boyfriend would become part of this crazy family.
More recently something happened that involved a close friend of mine. Her son is a few months younger than my son. Because my family is dominated by females- five girls and two boys in my generation and, up until last year, only one boy and six girls in the next I wasn’t as used to boys’ anatomy as I was to girls’. I remember after my son got circumcised, it was so foreign for me to do all the dressing and cleaning around his genitals. During one of our well-visit checkups with the pediatrician, the doctor made sure to tell us that we had to push his foreskin back from the head of his penis everyday or else it would stick.
Well, we were at a family friend’s house and my husband was instructing my friend about the intricacies of baby boy genitalia maintenance for her son. She was mentally taking notes as she was changing her squirming son’s diaper. Then she said, “What about yours?” My husband tried really hard not to be taken too off guard. “You want to know mine?” It took only a moment for her to register what he heard. “NO! NO! NO! Your son’s!” Another friend was passing by at the moment and caught the last part of the conversation. They laughed so hard. I wasn’t there to hear what happened, so during dessert my husband came to me and said, “So, your friend asked me a very inappropriate question today…”
Thankfully, when a girl does or says something inappropriate to my man, all I need is a sense of humor and not a lawyer. Hopefully, it will stay that way.